Some sales arrive at my desk in difficult conditions. Properties with legal issues, owners with outstanding debts, homes that haven’t been maintained in years. But few situations concentrate as much tension as this one: two people who can no longer stand each other, who share a property, and who need to agree on selling it.

A bitter divorce is one of the most complex sales processes in the industry. Not for technical reasons. For human ones.

The problem isn’t the property. It’s the communication.

When a couple reaches the point where they no longer share a space, no longer speak to each other, and every interaction goes through intermediaries — lawyers, family members, third-party messages — selling a property together becomes a maze.

The property is not at fault. The market isn’t either. The problem is that a sale requires coordinated decisions, and coordination requires a minimum level of communication between two people who have decided to have none.

This has real consequences:

• Responses take too long. An interested buyer makes an offer on Tuesday. By Friday they need an answer. If that answer has to go through two lawyers, a judge in some cases, and two people who don’t open each other’s messages, the buyer moves on to another property.
• Decisions get blocked. The asking price, accepting a counteroffer, the signing date, maintenance costs until completion. Every decision is a potential battleground.
• The property deteriorates in the meantime. I have seen homes arrive on the market in worse condition than necessary because neither party wanted to take responsibility for maintenance, and coordinating between them was simply unworkable.

Why this matters more than it seems on the Costa del Sol

The Benalmádena market — and the Costa del Sol more broadly — is not a market of patient buyers. International demand, which represents a significant share of transactions in this area, operates on short timelines. Buyers who fly in, view several properties over four days, and make quick decisions.

A sales process that cannot respond within 48 to 72 hours loses that demand. Not because the property isn’t of interest, but because the process isn’t in a position to serve that buyer.

There is no room for decision paralysis here.

The agent’s real role in this type of transaction

When the owners are not speaking to each other, the agent stops being a viewing facilitator and becomes the only functional point of contact in the entire process.

That means specific things:

Separate communication with each party. No joint meetings, no three-way calls. Each owner receives information independently, with the same level of detail and transparency on both sides. Neutrality is not a comfortable posture — it is a professional obligation.

Everything in writing. Every decision, every offer, every agreement on viewing conditions or pricing is documented. Not out of distrust, but because in situations of high emotional tension, misunderstandings are inevitable without a written record.

Timeline management with the lawyers. In these processes, each party’s solicitor plays a central role. The agent needs to coordinate with both firms to ensure that legal timelines and market timelines don’t collide.

Pricing without emotional agenda. One of them will want to ask for more. The other will want to sell quickly and close the chapter. The agent needs to arrive with concrete market data that neither position can easily dismiss. The price cannot become another battlefield of the breakdown.

What nobody says — but should

Selling a property in the context of a bitter divorce is exhausting for everyone involved. For the owners, for the lawyers, and for the agent.

But the numbers confirm something important: sales that drag on in a conflicted divorce tend to close below market value. Accumulated urgency, emotional fatigue, and judicial pressure — when a judge sets liquidation deadlines — mean the final negotiation happens from a position of weakness.

The alternative is not to wait for the parties to reconcile. It’s to structure the process from the start so it functions without needing that reconciliation.

A clear mandate, with terms agreed by both parties before going to market, with a single commercial point of contact, and with response timelines agreed in advance, can be the difference between a sale that closes in four months and one that drags on for two years.

One final observation

I have managed transactions of this kind in Benalmádena and the surrounding area. What surprises buyers most — when one of these processes works well — is that the internal complexity is invisible to them. They simply receive timely responses, well-organised viewings, and a completion that happens without drama.

That doesn’t happen by chance.

It happens because someone made the decision to manage the process professionally, even when the starting point was anything but calm.